Chinese government and state-media criticism of Takaichi has drawn a variety of responses online, ranging from nationalistic saber-rattling to cautious agreement to open mockery. Some Chinese netizens have used comments sections on related news items to criticize China’s leadership, to satirize certain social trends, and to draw attention to some of the daily indignities that Chinese citizens must often contend with.
天空溪流: Reform and opening, rapid economic development, rooting out corrupt officials, and allowing people to prosper—these are the best ways to get back at her.
叶无痕001: Military exercises + personal sanctions + sic a billion online trolls on her, then see if she admits defeat.
松林中飘逸的思绪: Kick some Japanese ass by defeating them in chip production and high tech, per capita GDP, and soccer.
基地组织二把手: Make her buy an Evergrande house and a Neta car.
百年郝和602: Make her work 12-hour days with only two days off per month.
小小蚂蚁924: Don’t believe rumors. Don’t spread rumors. DO spread rumors that get her arrested.
中山狼: Withhold her wages, then if she demands to be paid, arrest her for “maliciously demanding unpaid wages.”
叽咕嘻哈: Publish her financial assets. That’ll scare the hell out of her!
回旋飞镖: Get Japanese citizenship, then vote against her.
洒脱湖泊Cz: Send a team of chengguan (urban enforcers) to demolish her house without prior notice. Then claim, “We don’t know who demolished it; it was probably some temp workers.”
青翠的小草: Give her a pension of just over 200 yuan, and make her pay 400 yuan for the rural cooperative medical insurance scheme!
心无所依: Give her a non-standard electric scooter, then get two traffic cops to lurk behind the trees and catch her.
标6156236254: Confiscate her electric scooter and refuse to process her household registration.
小牛做设备: Play her Ambassador Wang’s videos, and trick her into going to a telecom-fraud park in Cambodia. [Wang Wenbin is China’s current ambassador to Cambodia.]
情有独钟: Turn her health code red, so she can’t go anywhere.
冕宸轩@神奇普洱: Establish a [CCP] branch in her office.
柒城love: Desposit all her money into Henan’s rural banks.
鸟瞰岷州: Send Japan’s two giant pandas back to China in two separate trips—make her suffer twice!
月下泉潭: Can China send me there to cement ties through a “marriage alliance”?
头号看官: Let’s keep our hands in our pockets to make her lose face.
老鲁闲说: Detain her on charges of picking quarrels and provoking trouble!
滇南甲壳虫: CCTV News sets aside five minutes a day to scold her. This has been going on for a month, so she must be utterly ashamed by now.
韩情脉脉: Make her work on one of our factory assembly lines, 12 hours a day with no days off, until she dies of overwork.
直爽的桀骜不驯: Put her on the credit blacklist, and limit her high-end purchases.
云淡风轻: Move her kids from the front row of class to the back row.
lwz0419: Trick her kids into taking out online loans with a 36% annual interest rate.
博学的柳叶oW2: Make her work as a delivery driver in China, where she can enjoy the city scenery along the way. [Refers to the backlash against a recent PR video by food-delivery platform Meituan depicting a young woman quitting her white-collar job to deliver food and “enjoy the scenery along the way.”]
三聚克伦特罗: Cancel her “retired cadre” perks.
远方: Annoy her by limiting the amount she can withdraw from her bank account, as a ruse to prevent her from withdrawing her savings.
乐意李: Cancel her retirement benefits.
自在鲸鱼GPx: Punish her by making her “Serve the People” for another eight years.
耶斯莫拉猕猴桃: Send two white-suited pandemic workers to seal the door of her building.
li那一年: Scare her to death by telling her the truth about Japan’s nuclear wastewater.
批评会坐牢: Tell her: “Don’t say we didn’t warn you.”
才高八斗奶茶Aw: Make her live our lives. [Chinese]
