Research commissioned by AXA Health found those in the ‘sandwich generation’ manage just under four hours of personal time a week, with the majority saying it has impacted their mental health
Hussain Manawer shares his care experience with AXA Health
The so-called ‘sandwich generation’ has just eight days a year to themselves – three times fewer than those without any dependants. A survey of 2,000 adults examined the nation’s caring responsibilities and revealed that those with both older and younger relatives relying on them are the most stretched when it comes to free time and self-care.
Those in the ‘sandwich generation’ manage just under four hours of personal time a week – the equivalent of eight days a year – yet spend 11-and-a-half hours a week attending to others’ needs. By contrast, the typical adult without any caring responsibilities enjoys an average of 12-and-a-half hours of free time each week.
Author Hussain Manawer understands what it feels like to be ‘caring burden of care'(Image: PinPep)
Nearly half (48%) of the ‘sandwich generation’ acknowledged they have less time to themselves than they would like, with 67% believing this has affected their mental health and 66% feeling the same about their physical health.
The study, commissioned by AXA Health as part of its Cover That Cares campaign, also discovered that 44% of the sandwich generation consistently put others before themselves. However, 36% feel that as a group they are frequently overlooked by society.
The health insurer collaborated with bestselling author, poet and mental health campaigner Hussain Manawer to compose a poem capturing the realities of caring for ourselves and others, reports the Daily Star.
Hussain said: “It was exciting to work on this poem and bring to life how the sandwich generation feel, while giving care a voice.
“I’ve first hand experience of carrying the burden of care, which made working on this poem deeply important to me and I hope helps share a message for anyone who feels that way.”
The research revealed that 14% of those in the sandwich generation cannot recall the last time they did something for themselves. A quarter of them even regard food shopping and completing household chores as ‘me time’ purely because it is time spent alone.
Hussain’s poem is part of the AXA’s Cover That Cares campaign (Image: PinPep)
The consequences of having less ‘me time’ than desired has left 51% of the sandwich generation feeling stressed, 45% struggling to switch off and 37% without time for their own hobbies.
The mental burden of organising their lives is cited as an obstacle to having more time to themselves by 27%. Likewise, 16% admitted they feel guilty about taking ‘me time’.
In an ideal world, they said their time alone would consist of relaxing, reading and exercising. Any additional spare time would ideally be spent with their partner, on family walks or going to the cinema with loved ones.
To carve out any time for themselves, the OnePoll data found those in the sandwich generation have to schedule it well in advance (26%), compared to just 11% of those without responsibilities.
Key support for this group was identified as having someone to ‘share the load’ with, simply having a listening ear and a physical gesture such as a hug.
Others said having people around them who understand their situation helps, as does a supportive text message or phone call. Heather Smith, CEO of AXA Health, said: “This group juggles caring for multiple generations and leaves little time for themselves, which as the stats show, has impacted both their physical and mental health.
“Hussain’s poem represents this and brings to life how those in the sandwich generation are struggling and how something as small as an understanding text message can make a difference.
“Sometimes all people need is to be seen and heard and we hope our members know we’re here to listen and support them when they need us.”
YOU MAKE ME FEEL SEEN – POEM BY HUSSAIN MANAWER
You show up for me without me asking
Notice the shift in my mood,
the way my body reacts to the never ending list of things to do
The way my shoulders carry unfinished tasks
the way my eyes are glancing
You show up for me with an oat latte,
A hug you know I need
A shoulder to rest my overthinking head,
Without me asking
As time grows on and life moves on
I’m learning to be, still, for a moment
To relax and not be too hard on myself
To breathe, that it’s ok with everything going to also
Prioritise me
See I do listen,
exactly how you taught me
Before you ask, I’ve done the bed sheets
The dishes too, The clothes are hung up to dry
The dust by the windows is gone, for now too,
You don’t need to say it,
But it works the same way back,
I appreciate everything you do for me too
Thank you, you’re probably thinking for what?
Well, I’m thanking you, because I feel your care,
through your warmth and love
Your messages that arrive at the right time that re-assure me
I’m good, everything’s ok, and that I’m not too much
I understand, we may not always have the chance to be there for each other
We’re busy and that’s nobody’s fault,
I get it, time just really flies for you and me,
so, with or without you in the room
Or wherever you are, I just want you to know, I’m grateful for your support
And you do, you make me feel seen.
